by dequi kioni-sadiki
Sekou always teased me about choosing not to use his name. My response to him was always, like him, I like my name.
It’s now been one and a half years since Sekou’s Transition. And while time does indeed fly right on by, for me those days and months leading up to his departure still feel like yesterday.
I remember all the support he and I got from his comrades and our Movement Family in our time of need. I remember the many interactions we had with hospital staff, physical therapists and the community during his four and a half month hospitalization. I remember more than I would like the many ambulance rides, ER visits, ICU stays, tests after tests, the poking and prodding he endured, the medical equipment, doctors and nurses that filled the room the morning he agreed to go on the ventilator ‘cause I asked him to. And I remember him biting the breathing tube, shaking his head no, and fighting against all of it when he woke from the induced coma he was placed in so his body could get a much-needed rest against the infection raging throughout and debilitating him.
I also remember those last one and a half days of his slowly disappearing breath after he was taken off the machine that was breathing for him and the many folk who gathered around his bedside to say their goodbyes. I will remember and cherish all the support we got from his comrades and our Movement Family just as I remember but would like to forget the hostility, chaos and disrespect a few folk brought into the mix during those last days. I remember all the bits and pieces of those days so very clearly for they are embedded within my Spirit and memory with a mix of Love, sorrow and appreciation.
I miss Sekou every day. I think of, laugh and talk to him daily just as I pray to Allah for the expansion of his grave and that he grant me patience over my loss. I continue to yearn for and cry for the moments and days forever lost to me/us and am comforted that my cries no longer sound as inconsolable or guttural as they once did. I no longer want to scream. I simply want to remember and hold onto the Love we shared.
I am now at a space where I recite the words of this poem a little less:
“Loving the gone” by Sara Rian
i was dragged into a new chapter that day.
one that started when your life ended
i grabbed at the precious pages
but life ripped them away.
new chapters have come
and many of them good.
but i still find myself
wanting to go back.
to stay with you.
bookmarked
in the part of my life
where you are still living.
and this poem a little more:
“Wild hope” by Donna Ashworth
so here i am
greeting the robins you send me
counting the feathers you drop
and the rainbows you draw
realising
there is a new chapter of us
we are not done
it’s different
but it is something
and until we meet again
I will make it enough.
and I am learning to accept and embrace these words:
“When we lose someone we love, we must not learn to live without them but to live with the love they left behind.”
I don’t remember who sent these poems/words to me, and i wish that i could tell them how deeply their offerings have spoken to me.
I am deeply grateful for the help of many who have helped me discover ways to ease into and accept this new life and find some measure of peace that my Love is at peace with Allah granting all his after-this-life Prayers.
And so on this Anniversary of his birth and our marriage, I am remembering Sekou, our lives and Love together!!!
Happy Birthday Babe
Happy Anniversary
I Loved you then
and I Love you still!
Sekou Odinga Presente
I invite you to join me in celebrating the life and legacy of my dear Sekou Odinga today and i gift you these short video presentations as a token of my Love and Appreciation for your presence, solidarity and support in our lives.
Comrades, Family & Friends Reflect on Sekou (32 minutes): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gqegu2877d8OzYNz-WncB9e_M0yLRF1h/view?usp=drive_link
Uncle Sekou photo video montage (6 minutes): https://drive.google.com/file/d/1a_nC6FwlxVbk0R-GAOxPpgt4JTc-gVnF/view (uncle sekou.m4v)
BLACK BUTTERFLY dedication from Maya Azucena: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/qbkibc0s9zwppw4zie140/BlackButterflySEKOUmayaAzucena.MOV?rlkey=f4z56kcxxoulc496g4rdtde3l&dl=0
Our Giant Shoulders: https://drive.google.com/file/d/16gQw3t9qtFCCZXIfHo57jkk__4a1toaD/view
Be Sekou video by M1, Divine RBG & RevLov: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/dvp9i3lgm3tzwgkmulcqe/BE-SEKOU-by-M-1-Divine.mp4?rlkey=lkhk3qo8phcvmblhvr4q4ih7i&dl=0
take good care. keep safe and well
Peace & Blessings,
dequi kioni-sadiki
Brief bios of Sekou and dequi from the African American Literature Book Club
These were written before Sekou’s passing – ed.
Sekou Odinga was a member of Malcolm X’s Organization of Afro-American Unity, a founding member of the New York chapter of the Black Panther Party as well as the Black Panther International Section, and was a member of the NY Panther 21. A citizen of the Republic of New Afrika and combatant of the Black Liberation Army, Sekou was captured in October 1981, mercilessly tortured, and spent the following 33 years behind bars — a prisoner of war and political prisoner of the U.S. empire. Since his release in November 2014, he has remained a stalwart fighter for justice and for the release of all political prisoners.
déqui kioni-sadiki is the chair of the Malcolm X Commemoration Committee and was a leader of the Sekou Odinga Defense Committee, which waged a successful campaign for the release of her husband. A tireless coalition-builder and organizer, dequi is a radio producer of the weekly show “Where We Live” on WBAI Radio, Pacifica; an educator with the NYC Department of Education; and a member of the Jericho Movement to Free All Political Prisoners.
The Bay View thanks A’isha Mohammad, PsyD, PhD, co-chair of the National Jericho Movement, for sharing dequi’s essay.
